There are two choices when it comes to healing abuse. You either ignore the pain and never heal it or take the time to do the work and live the rest of your life without the stress, feeling peaceful, joyful, centered and with love.’
Forgiveness is the first step. For many years people would tell me “Forgive your parents!”
Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all you had to do was say “I forgive you.”
But it isn’t that simple. I tried everything including not seeing my parents, thinking if I didn’t go near them I would be able to let it go. It was not any easier. I read books about forgiveness and that didn’t make it any better. I tried hypnotherapy and it did lessen the effects but didn’t remove the pain completely.
I was challenged by a friend to thank my parents for the lessons they provided me and my reaction was immediate and abruptly “For what?”
I knew I had to do more work and I wasn’t very excited about it. I felt exhausted from all the work I had been doing. It was frustrating and at many points, it felt useless. I still felt the weight of the abuse. I still couldn’t get my parents dysfunctional treatment out of my head.
I would question their actions over and over again. How could they have treated their children the way they had? How could anyone have been that cruel?