Absolutely any negative outburst is a form of abuse. Whether you are yelling or physically assaulting someone. Children have not developed the ability to understand the difference between discipline and abuse.
Children are extremely sensitive to the infliction of tone, abruptness and any perceived threat. Occasional exposure to these threats can be overcome by a more persistent form of nurturing because children are extremely forgiving. More than anything, they love unconditionally, until they can no longer trust their environment.
All children are born perfect, it’s their environment that robs them of their perfection.
The challenge of reversing these imperfections will always present itself when children compensate by displaying the reactive behavior. They will exhibit more drastic examples of acting out once they no longer trust their environment because of the abuse which they have been exposed.
It becomes more difficult to remove the negativity the longer children are exposed to abuse.
I grew up in a household where my parents were raised by parents who were extremely abusive. I’m sure my grandparents were subjected to similar abuses as well. There’s no doubt the abuse stems back as far as my family history can be traced.
I remember my father mentioning how his father drank on Friday and Saturday nights. From the time he was 15, he would have to go to the local bar and pour his father into the car to safely drive him home. The majority of the abuse stemmed from his father’s drinking habits.
My parents didn’t drink unless it was a special occasion. Often children exhibit the opposite behavior of their parents.